Softball Strikeouts.

A about a year ago I decided to start playing softball again. I played in middle and high school and intramural in college so me playing wasn’t a stretch. I initially sought out a team through the local YMCA like organization but I was later approached by an old teammate to play on another team. It was a tournament team. This involved spending whole weekends on the ball field. Being a new face I seemed to draw a lot of attention to myself, innocently.
It wasn’t long before every weekend there was a new and different guy trying to “talk” to me. It was during this time that I got firsthand knowledge of all the foolishness guys carry on with.

1. Mr. Ballpark Player
This is the dude who claims to single because every so technically he is. He has no girlfriend but he prides himself on having a girl on each team. He’s a well known whore to all who frequent the park. But of course the reputation isn’t enough for some simple minded women and they have to find out for themselves. Leaving him enough women to sustain his ho antics.

2. Mr. I Play Softball Therefore I’m Cool
This is the guy that was voted most likely to be lame in high school but has since found out he can hit a softball really far. And in some ho circles that is warrant enough to get the cookie. The problem is not so deep down he’s still lame.

3. Mr. Unhappily Married
This is the man (I use the term loosely) who spends his days on the softball field and his night in bed with his wife. That fact doesn’t stop him from trying to pick of women at the park. He tries hard and tries to soothe his conscience by referring to his FAMILY as BAGGAGE and leaving the choice of whether or not be a home wrecker to his latest conquest. Be advised a simple no will not be enough to sit this man down he will request a reminder every time u see him.

4. Mr. Straight No Chaser
This is the dude who introduces himself like this, “hello my name is …. I couldn’t help but notice your a beautiful girl I’m very attracted to you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. he has the nerve to be upset, even offended when this tactic falls flat.

5. The Helpful Mentor
This is the nasty old man who thinks that just because he’s old enough I be my grandfather that it’s his personal duty to “school me in the ways of love.” Um…ew. This is the worst of the five simply because he’s more than old enough to know better.

All these men need to go sit down somewhere. But the scariest thought to me is somewhere at sometime these tactics probably worked for them. Yikes.